The internal image you are judging yourself by, the normal situation you want to succeed in and see yourself in is performing in public, not playing or singing alone at home in your room. That is the exception, the unusual situation that you appreciate, but don't plan for, being at home. Replace that internal picture of sitting at home on your bed to making your music on a stage and 300 people listening. I don't mean that so much as being "big time", rather that you are performing at that intensity and effort level.
Be an apologist for styles you love by being excellent and understanding where others are coming from; make it easy to like your music.